Gaming Addict

I actually never thought this day would come, and I’m as surprised as anybody else should be, that it in fact has.  I’m actually excited for a gimmicky family-friendly goofy Wii game.  But that’s because this is no ordinary gimmicky family-friendly goofy Wii game, this is SEGA’s Wacky World Of Sports.  Wacky World Of Sports isn’t your typical wacky sports game, as all the crazy events you’ll compete in are based upon actual ‘sports’ played around the globe.

This sounds like the coolest thing I’ve ever heard of, despite the Wii’s gimmicky motion controls and horrifically bad ‘next-gen’ graphics.  I legitimately cannot wait to play this, while I’m not expecting brilliance from SEGA, Wacky World Of Sports may actually be enough for me to dust off my unused Wii and hook that sucker back up.  I’m all in for some competitive cheese wheel rolling!

Also announced today, and I only thought it was interesting considering I can’t believe the game finally has a release date, was Ubisoft’s Splinter Cell Conviction to be released by Christmas.  That’s right, the long awaited new Splinter Cell game that’s been pumped up for years now is finally going to see the light of day, and given the that the definition of stealth gameplay has been changing within the series, I can’t wait to play this one.

It’s absolutely no secret to anybody that reads this site fairly regularly that I’m an absolutely huge Mass Effect fan, and in dire anticipation for the upcoming Mass Effect 2.  Well throw another game on that anticipation fire as just announced is an iPhone Mass Effect game.  Coolest thing ever made in the history of the world.  Portable Mass Effect is the best thing I’ve ever heard in my life.  

The game will be called Mass Effect: Jacob’s Story, and will be a two hour story driven Mass Effect experience in which players take on the role Jacob Taylor, who uncovers a terrorist plot to strike against civilizations greatest beacon of hope.  BioWare promises the game will bridge the first Mass Effect to the upcoming sequel, and that the game will feature more back story from some of your favorite characters.  I’m dying to find out what’s going on with Ashley Williams and Garrus, the two compatriots I most often took with me throughout the first Mass Effect’s campaign, I also hope they’ll be available in Mass Effect 2 for that matter.

Mass Effect: Jacob’s Story is described as a graphic novel experience, which will feature a well written story driving the gameplay, and frantic top-down shooter carnage thrown in.  And I’m already predicting that this will be the coolest mobile game ever made.  As long as it doesn’t feel cash-in/gimmicky like the Metal Gear Solid Touch game, I’m completely down.

No release date, but expect a price tag of around $2.99, not bad at all.  

I understand I’m not exactly in the target demographic for these games, but that doesn’t mean I still don’t understand the appeal.  I just don’t get simulation games for things that are easy to do in real life.  I can understand like sport sims or something along those lines, because not everybody, in fact practically nobody, gets to play a sport at the professional level for a pro team.  But cooking?  Really?  You want to play a cooking game in which they try to get the Wii’s motion controls as close to real life as possible, but you don’t want to actually do something proactive and accomplish something in the real world by actually learning to cook?

Now I can understand kids playing Cooking Mama, because children really have no place around the dangers of the kitchen utensils and stove.  But Gardening Mama?  Anybody can garden can’t they?  And seriously, aren’t there better things to demo on the DS than virtual bulb sorting, soil tilling, or pest spraying?   I understand there are plenty of parents out there that want semi-educational as well as nonviolent videogame experiences like these for their kids.  But there’s really no videogame that’s completely educational, so just let your kids have fun with Mario, because those are nonviolent and ridiculously entertaining.

Enough with the pointless simulations that just feel tacked on to use gimmicky Nintendo ‘innovations’ like a touch screen or motion control.  

In the biggest shock of the day, and I say that remarkably sarcastically, Konami has decided not to publish the ridiculously controversial Six Days In Fallujah, citing a remarkable amount of backlash from angry would be consumers.  The thing I don’t understand is, what was Konami expecting?

We’re talking about a war that most people in the world disagree with on principle, and a battle that primarily involved American Soldiers savagely murdering thousands of unarmed civilians in a city that was peaceful to begin with.  And Konami didn’t know there was going to be some backlash from their decision to publish a faithful re-creation of one of the worst crimes of humanity in the modern era, and one that continues to rage on?  What the hell were they expecting?  

I’m all for not censoring anything and just using your own judgment when it comes to entertainment products, mostly because there’s an audience for everything, and not everything is for you.  I hate thought police tactics like trying to ban games from being played by anybody just because you don’t like them, I don’t believe in having an attitude that says “I don’t like something, so you shouldn’t either.”  But I can understand the backlash here, just because of the controversy involved, the fact that the incidents are so close at hand, and also considering the war is still in progress.  

But the main thing to take away from this is the absolute stupidity of whomever is running Konami.  I still refuse to believe they didn’t figure people would be this upset over a game based on what’s happening currently in Fallujah.  

I have a new addiction, yesterday it may have been Oregon Trail for iPhone, but now it is Stickwars for iPhone.  Stickwars is freaking awesome, mostly because you’re given the practical power of a god to defend your fortress against would be stick figure invaders.  You see, droves of stick figure warriors attempt to overtake your structure, and starting out your only defense against them is your humble finger.  Placing it on screen on the nearest stick figure man will allow you to pick him up, and toss him away killing him and protecting your fortress.  This is ridiculously fun, and gets pretty frantic and ridiculous as you progress throughout the game. 

As you advance you gain access to any manner of cool things like prisons that allow you to capture prisoners and improve your cash multiplier for each level.  Not to mention additions to your fortress whether it be health upgrades, or new weaponry to unleash on your feeble stick man foes.

Pretty freaking cool.  

Ever since I downloaded it, I’ve been completely addicted to Oregon Trail for iPhone.  Mostly because of the fact that it completely reminds me of my very early school days when we used to play the original Oregon Trail game on those awful Apple green dot matrix computers.  The teachers always said it was a learning experience to see what life was really like, but to me it was just good fun.  Making decisions as to which paths to take, or what methods you should employ in your journey to survive the grueling test of 19th century pioneer life in America.  

Managing your cash and family’s health was all well and good, but hunting, hunting was the freaking coolest thing ever.  Practically like an asteroids mini-game within an ‘educational’ experience, there was nothing cooler than being able to go shoot as much crap as possible, under the guise of learning.

And that’s probably why my fond memories still find a ridiculous amount of enjoyment from the new Oregon Trail in it’s cell phone game incarnation.  Updated graphics and gameplay, but still capturing the elements that made such a simple game a ridiculous amount of fun.  Even if things are a bit cartoony for my normal gaming tastes.  

Yeah, yeah, I’m definitely completely addicted.  

Battlefield 1943 has been priced and given a release date window.  Battlefield 1943 will retail on Xbox Live for $15, and will be released in the month of June, and you absolutely need to make sure you have fifteen bucks hanging around because the new Battlefield looks fantastic.  Toned down graphics that aren’t exactly cutting edge, but featuring beautifully huge environments to do battle, and the same engine from Battlefield: Bad Company that will allow you to destroy pretty much everything.  

I can’t wait, because I still love that concept.  Can’t wait to be given the full range of destructive battle fun that Battlefield always offered in their multiplayer games, but with the addition of fully destructible environments, this is going to be the coolest thing ever made.  Seriously.

Also announced for Xbox Live is a Star Trek game that will no doubt be absolutely horrid with, Star Trek: D-A-C.  The game is planned as a top down space shooter, which is likely to be very similar to the previously released and shockingly horrid Battlestar Galactica top down shooter.  So basically this will be every other space shooter you’ve ever played before, and there really are a lot on Xbox Live Arcade, only with a few licensed Star Trek ships?  Not worth the money I say.  

Why god why?  I ask myself as I’ve just read that Lucasarts is supposedly going to publish a game for Xbox 360/PS3 based on the animated series and movie Star Wars: Clone Wars.  When we could have fantastic things that fans like me enjoy, such as another Battlefront, instead we’re getting yet another in an aggravatingly long line of Star Wars junk that has essentially ruined the franchise.

Star Wars has been grinding into a strictly for kiddies series for a very long time now, and the Clone Wars show pretty much sent the franchise over the edge, with the overabundance of cutesy stupid moments.  Now instead of a game everyone loved, again like Battlefront, we’re getting another Clone Wars game?!  

What is happening?  What happened to the days of really badass and seriously cool Star Wars experiences like Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast, or Jedi Academy, or Knights Of The Old Republic, or Shadows Of The Empire?  What happened to the darkness of the Star Wars franchise.  That terrifying feel of evil that The Empire Strikes Back brought about?  Now everything feels cheesy and cartoony.   Like the clones run around cheerfully fighting a battle while people are viciously killed all around, but instead of any sort of mention of the horrors of wars and evil, they crack jokes and do goofy stuff to score physical comedy points.  

It all makes me sad, and one more game to bring the franchise further from the things that made it extremely entertaining, also makes me sad.  No wonder I had to turn to Trek to keep my space geekdom alive.  But…oh wait…that looks soon to be destroyed as well, as the series is about to re-launch under JJ Abrams tutelage.  In which Abrams is set to scrap any characteristics that made Trek appealing or original, and instead turn the series into a big budget action affair with a plotline you’ll forget ten minutes after having seen the film.  

Sorry, got a little rant-y there.  Happens sometimes though.  At least we all have our memories of Battlestar Galactica, and the four shining seasons of dark plotlines in space we were presented. 

Where are the cool space battle games lately?  I’m disappointed at how there seems to be a lack of attention given to consoles when space is considered.  And I don’t particularly understand it, considering how awesome a really good space fighter flight sim would be on Xbox 360 given the ability to take play on Live with your friends.  I understand all of that can be done in the PC realm, and that PC’s are better designed to handle any sort of sim game, not to mention the PC is packed with decent space flight games, but I don’t understand why they aren’t attempted very often on consoles.  

I want to play Freespace 2 from the comfort of my living room, on my big LCD widescreen home theater set up, not hunched in front of my monitor at my comp station.  I know it’s possible, and not that difficult to set up my comp for that and all, but it’s much more difficult and time consuming than just having a good game to play on Xbox or PS3 considering both of those consoles are already in the same room with my best TV.  But there’s nothing to play on them!

Sure there’s Star Trek: Legacy and Project Sylpheed: Arc of Deception, and those games are semi-fun and all, but not the great space fare I’m talking about or craving.  Xbox and PS3 need an in depth space experience, the likes of legendary PC space games Freelancer, or once again Freespace.  Something awesome and worthy of devoting all your time to.

And like I said, c’mon, Xbox Live is crying out for a great space shooter.  Setting up a party with your friends and flying around the galaxy to shoot the crap out of anyone that might oppose you would be the most fun thing ever.  

A slew of PSP news today…or maybe not a slew, but a little bit of news, well really two announcements which are pretty exciting.  Not exactly enough to make somebody that doesn’t own a PSP run out to purchase one, but definitely two new additions that will entertain current PSP owners, like myself.  The first of which that Sony has announced SOCOM: U.S. Navy SEALs Fireteam Bravo 3.  I’m semi interested in this, considering SOCOM has always been a decent franchise, although the PSP iterations have left much to be desired.  

Mostly because the PSP is just a horrible medium for a shooter that involves three dimensional shooting.  In fact the only shooter I’ve been impressed with in terms of design has been Star Wars Battlefront: Renegade Squadron, and that mostly just because of your ability to lock on to other players, making it fairly easy to shoot any foes.  But I’m always willing to give SOCOM another try, especially considering how awesome the PS2 games have been in the past.  As long as Fireteam Bravo 3 is fun and offers a reasonable amount of badass feeling, as being a Navy SEAL should make you feel badass, I’m down for at least a rental. 

Also announced, well actually more confirmed considering the story broke and I even reported on it a while back, is the PSP version of LittleBigPlanet.  Which is exceptionally cool as except for graphics all the fantastic gameplay of the PS3 version should remain intact.  And if you haven’t yet played LittleBigPlanet on PS3, then you really should get around giving it a shot.  Seriously.  

I love games with a massive amount of replay ability, but LBP offers not only engaging fantastic levels, but an in depth level editor, allowing you to create your own masterpieces.  Or if you’re just not that creative, you can download other levels that people have uploaded to Playstation Network, essentially creating a game experience that never ends.  Coolest concept ever made.